I'd like to offer a few words for consideration on the family and other important topics, being in the application process for a long time and having had many tough conversations with family about joining the military.
I think "getting your family on board" is not the best way to think about it. The idea is not to sell your family on your endeavors. I would recommend really thinking deeply about the reason you'd like to join the military and making sure it's a good one. By good I mean that ideally you'd like to bring positive change. Help people. Improve quality of life. Save lives. Realize that there is a very high chance this may not turn out so. Armed conflict, for example, may not result in any of these positive consequences, and instead result in quite the opposite, as history has shown countless times. Do you look at it as saving lives or taking lives? You should think about that too. At the very least, to not become a liability, but rather gain useful skills and become an asset. Think about what you may be asked to do in the military. Do you believe you can? Do you believe the consequences will be positive or negative? Think about your particular trade/occupation in the military. Do you see yourself being an asset in that particular trade? Think about politics too. Are you prepared to follow orders? Realize that you will not necessarily always understand or agree with them. Think about your loved ones. Your responsibility is not only to your country but to your family, to people who have given you everything. So instead of just convincing your family, I would suggest talking with them about everything, and making sure you are altogether in agreement and at peace. You will feel much better and more satisfied, whether in the end your decision is to join or not. The most satisfaction and peace of mind comes from believing that you've made the right choice, not from the actual end result.
Some of the bad attitudes and their resolutions, in my opinion:
- Joining just because you have extra testosterone and just want to shoot guns and blow things up all the time. Of course it's a lot of fun. But there's a lot more to it. And your actions have consequences. Think about them. Don't do things just because they seem "cool". That kind of thinking only serves yourself.
- Joining simply because you don't know what to do with your life. I frown every time I hear that. I understand many people, especially young people, experience this. I'm no exception. However, it's your life and you only have one. Don't just float through life if you can help it. Put in some effort, figure out what you like, where you belong, and what you want to achieve and why. Then decide how you can best achieve it, whether with the military or in the civilian world. Try to have reasons for why you do things, have a bigger picture in mind. It doesn't have to be complete, or exact, or set in stone. But it's always good to continue thinking about why you do the things you do. Don't do them "just because", as you may regret them later, when you wise up. I'm not saying don't take chances. I'm just saying do some thinking. And make sure the thinking is your own. Recruiters are there to guide you, and I have met many helpful recruiters, however they also have an interest in recruiting you, keep that in mind. In my experience, however, recruiters don't push you to do anything you don't want to, so that's great to see.
- Don't disregard advice of your family and the older generation. While some advice may be outdated or based on a different place, a lot of things in life never change. It's important to do the things you think are right, and make your own mistakes to really learn. However, don't dismiss life advice from older and wiser people. Process it and see what you can take from it, see what you agree and disagree with. Give it thought and make your own decision in the end. It took me a long time to really appreciate this. You know how parents tell you "you'll thank me later"? There's a lot of truth to that. Also, don't resent your family if they disagree with your military decision. In most cases, it simply means they care about you probably more than you realize, but maybe they just haven't quite found the right ways or words to express that.
- Don't have the attitude that the military world is cooler than the civilian world, or vise versa. Don't become that annoying army guy or girl, who act superior the minute they've completed boot camp. It's obnoxious and your friendships might suffer because of it. Be confident and humble. We all have our own path to follow and our own battles to fight. If you know in your heart you are doing the right thing, and you are happy with your career choice, you shouldn't have to prove anything to anyone or seek validation. Humble competent professionals are usually the most respected.
Just my :2c:. Not trying to influence anyone one way or another. Just some thinking points that I thought were worth a mention, to help people think deeper about the meaning of their actions and the impact they make.
