"Dear John" letter

[W. Hall]

A Canadian stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter
from his girlfriend
back home. It read as follows:

Dear Ricky,
I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you‘ve been gone, and it‘s not fair to either of us. I‘m sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.
Love, Becky

The Canadian, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow soldiers for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies. There were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note:

Dear Becky,
I‘m so sorry, but I can‘t quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me.

 

[Franko]

Well done...she deserves worse though, cowardly act that was.

Regards

 

[Ex-Dragoon]

LOL a very old story....my grandfather had a similiar one from World War 2. Still a great one.

 

[Slim]

She‘s probably got a ton of girlfriends around her that are saying " Its o.k. Becky ( Buffy, Fluffy...?) You shouldn‘t go out with some nasty soldier anyway. Why...He‘s probably cheated on you already! ( in Afganistan no less!)

As you can see I got one myself once... :evil:

 

[Thompson_JM]

Relationships are overated anyways...

at least your buddies wil never cheat on you, and you can always find women in the various classy establishments around such exotic locales as Pett, and gagetown...

 

[Marauder]

I feel sorry for the guys who have to find out by coming home and finding stickers on the back of the headboard...

 

[Slim]

Originally posted by Marauder:
[qb] I feel sorry for the guys who have to find out by coming home and finding stickers on the back of the headboard... [/qb]

...Or by opening the door and finding an empty house and bank account. Thats happened more than once!

Slim

 

[Yeoman]

I sent one to a girl I just had enough with will on my basic para. I called her the first weekend, and she bitched at me about it. So I sent her a "dear bitch" letter.
slim; I‘ve heard many a stories about that happening. I remember Sgt. Rogers told me that story about that when he got back from Kosovo. That man is very disturbing. Shouldn‘t have retired, learnt so much from him.
Greg

 

[EX-STRAT]

Tread lightly boys, what comes around goes around, you make your bed you lie in it...ain‘t life grande?

 

[Enzo]

Jesus, I‘m still laughing about that first post.

I returned home after a bit of a time of it and my g/f informed me that she cheated the week before. Made it the entire time I was away (almost a year) and then that? I just laughed. She was part of my decision to leave the army at that time. Still managed to make my life **** for the next 2.5 years in many ways. Must be fate eh.

Whatever

God I gotta get back in the game, I‘m restless as ****.

 

[tmbluesbflat]

Here is a story that occurred when 1PPCLI was in Germany back 63-66 A Soldier whose habits included to much booze and wife beating, came home late one night with a buddy, abusing his wife while exhorting his buddy to "do" her etc. The embarrased buddy left and our hero was laughing sirtting on the couch when his wife cranked on the noggin with a cast iron frying pan. When he awoke some hours later with a vicious head ache he found himself stripped naked and bound securely to the bed and his loving wife waiting for him to awaken so that she could begin her instrutions on how he was about to change his attitude give up drinking never ever again abuse her or the children again. Her classes continued for several days passed the weekend until the CPROC went look for him (AWOL) they found him still bound , cuts and bruises by the dozens )She said she beat him until she got to tired, rested and beat him some more)he was lying in his accumulated excrement and almost out of his mind. He however survived as did their marriage (at least until last I saw them, about another year, they may still be together for all I know) There was some sort of inquiry but the resolution was that he would forever more be a "GOOD BOY" and I believe he was.

 

[tmbluesbflat]

I had been on course then from course to exercise etc you all know the drills! I was the first vehicle back from Sennelager doing convoy guidance etc right before the garrison. Wave salute make certain they all head into the camp without creaming any of the neighbours. In effect I was the last man standing, The jeep goes home with me to PMQ‘s bug out equiped washed fueled ammo the whole ball of wax, I have now gone some 70-80hrs with no sleep I drive into the PMQ‘S park and stagger in so tired, it is about 0100hrs, and I head for the bed room trying to be quiet as I open the bed room door I realise that somebody is having sex with my wife/ I‘m delerious and to tired to care I lay down in the hall in full gear the whole ball of wax weapons and all and I slept only to wake up a short while later by a Coy S/Sgt from another Coy than mine (I was Recce Pt) support coy, anyway this S/sgt was shaking me and slapping me awake in no uncertain manner screaming at me and god knows what, the CPROC were arriving and the neighbours were there screaming etc I was so confused, messed up I didn‘t know from nothing just leave me alone let me sleep etc. I would fall asleep as they were hollering etc it was a nightmare! The long and short of it was that I was in the wrong PMQ, mine was the same house but one block further down the road. I was ribbed about that for twenty years or more and sometimes memories ignite and around we go again!

 

[Infanteer]

Great stories TM.

 

[Slim]

Another great forum...Stuff that civvies just wouldn‘t understand...Well done to Paradesquare for starting it. ( Almost thought it was Franko...I had to look to make sure it wasn‘t!)

 

[Franko]

TANKS Slim...I really needed the punch to the kidney

Regards

 

[Slim]

Originally posted by Franko:
[qb] TANKS Slim...I really needed the punch to the kidney

Regards [/qb]

All in fun Brother, all in fun.

Slim